an overheard telephone conversation..
"i'm still in the office.. but wait for me, ok? i'm just finishing things here.. (pause) i'm not sure how long it will take... (pause) are you sure? it's raining.. do you have an umbrella with you? (pause)......
yes, it was my engineer talking to his wife. i didn't mean to listen, but i was waiting for someone who was waiting for him to finish with his phonecall. i didn't hear the end of it though. i needed a break so i went out to have a smoke and spend some time alone. when i went back, i saw him at the lobby with his things, waiting for the elevator. we were both surprised to see each other that we didn't even talk. i received a text message from him a few minutes after. he said he had to go home to pick up his wife. i felt disappointed...
i wanted what i overheard in that conversation. no, i'm not wishing i was his wife or anything like that. i just wanted the idea of having someone caring for me and worrying about me the way he did with his wife. someone who would drop whatever he was doing so he could keep the promise he made. it's been a while since i last felt genuine concern from anyone. i sulked the rest of the night that i didn't text him back. i suddenly felt the big void that's been hovering my life for the past years. i felt empty and lonely.
the next day, i tried to treat him with nonchalance, willing myself to stay away so as not to cause myself more disappointment. but he suddenly pulled me aside and asked why i didn't text him back the night before. i came up with an acceptable excuse and he smiled with relief. he was worried and thought i was angry with him over something.
maybe there's no need for me to feel envious after all.
"i'm still in the office.. but wait for me, ok? i'm just finishing things here.. (pause) i'm not sure how long it will take... (pause) are you sure? it's raining.. do you have an umbrella with you? (pause)......
yes, it was my engineer talking to his wife. i didn't mean to listen, but i was waiting for someone who was waiting for him to finish with his phonecall. i didn't hear the end of it though. i needed a break so i went out to have a smoke and spend some time alone. when i went back, i saw him at the lobby with his things, waiting for the elevator. we were both surprised to see each other that we didn't even talk. i received a text message from him a few minutes after. he said he had to go home to pick up his wife. i felt disappointed...
i wanted what i overheard in that conversation. no, i'm not wishing i was his wife or anything like that. i just wanted the idea of having someone caring for me and worrying about me the way he did with his wife. someone who would drop whatever he was doing so he could keep the promise he made. it's been a while since i last felt genuine concern from anyone. i sulked the rest of the night that i didn't text him back. i suddenly felt the big void that's been hovering my life for the past years. i felt empty and lonely.
the next day, i tried to treat him with nonchalance, willing myself to stay away so as not to cause myself more disappointment. but he suddenly pulled me aside and asked why i didn't text him back the night before. i came up with an acceptable excuse and he smiled with relief. he was worried and thought i was angry with him over something.
maybe there's no need for me to feel envious after all.
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